An update

Jun. 17th, 2009 02:52 am
sephirajo: (Default)
Apparently it's illegal to stay in a house with no power after 8:30, at least in the city I'm in. Some ordence of something.

Anyway, I'm at my mom's. No, we haven't gotten any help on the bill. And no, I don't expect things will turn out okay this time. This is like a softer form of eviction. I'm going to go get the dry socket looked at tomorrow, but given the pain has kept me from sleeping well AT ALL and I've forgot my muscle relaxers tomorrow will be another day off of work.

I'm a very depressed Jo. A few of you have offered hugs, but I'm disappointed that none of my family members have even said anything. :/ Many of them follow my face book updates and, well, everyone's more concerned about Aunt Jenny's new baby then they are about me and my family getting kicked out of our home. Since what's happening is basically a softer form of eviction.

There is emergency assistance available. But they want all the documentation, including my birth certificate, which, surprise, surprise we don't have. As I was born in Iowa it will take about TWO WEEKS to get it. I do not expect we'll be able to get it.

Hell, we don't even have car insurance right now because of how little I've been pulling in.

cut for the emo )

I dislike my life at the moment.
sephirajo: (Sharksplode!)
Anyone feel like paypaling me 15$ so I don't get 90+ in overdraft fees? o__O

In other news: Adam called last night apparently horrified as to what he had told me to fuck off over. So he'll pay for me to get the tooth out. It comes out tomorrow.

I had to leave work, over drugged and in massive pain.

I dislike my exsistence at the moment. Chuck has new meds, time release of the depekote, and it's working wonders.

But yeah. :/ Me beg for money now so I don't end up being hit massively with overdraft fees because banks have no mercy and don't care you have a two year old with two diapers left and no food.

Welcome to America.
sephirajo: (On a Full Moon)
...Has been an illness related hell. I'm still sitting on a couple of logs, I think... I'm not sure so whoever I may owe the posting of something, ping me? Anyway, I'm finally starting to get over the cold from hell. The deafness/congestion and coughing hit really hard again today and went to see a NP.

She listened to me better than the doctor did and gave me cough syrup instead of telling me to use honey, agreed that I have a cold, not allergies but gave me an inhaler recognizing that breathing problems are really common with my two conditions. She also refilled my percoset for me after I told her it was for my cramps and when my fibro acts up. And, you know, she listened. Something the doctor from hell didn't. The doctor from hell the other week insisted that my problem was my cat and that I had to get rid of my cat and I wouldn't be truly healthy until I did so, got a neti pot and started eating all natural foods.

If it wasn't for the fact that my sinuses felt like they were filled with burning oil when I saw him I think I would've kicked him in his balls. Especially when he kept saying, "you're a healthy young woman." I did convince him to give me antibiotics though. Which likely staved off a sinus infection. I get a lot of these.

Either way, I'm feeling a lot better and I don't expect to be missing work anymore this month. I've said that before, though, so let's see how this goes. As far as Mass this week goes, I'll be around all day Sunday. I have to go to Saturday Night mass because, quite simply, lilies are my kryptonite only without the cool glowing and junk.

We're supposed to, in theory, get the money from Dad's last paycheck/30 days paid vacation/yearly bonus soon. I'll believe it when I see it. We did send the paperwork on the way. The boys are estimating 11k a person, and it'd be nice.

But I'll believe it when I see it. I have very little faith in things. I find if I'm pessimistic I can't be upset by anything anymore. I mean, quite a few things lately have just turned out for the worse. On the 3rd of April it was two years since we found Erika.

I miss her a lot. And I miss Dad so much. Le sigh.

I do have quite a lot to update on, but I will do all that later. I have a few plot ideas swimming in my head... hopefully I'll get those down. And short and long stories... And Chuck has to get his depekote levels tomorrow.

But anyway, now a meme. I stole this from [ profile] nute.

Books/reading Meme )
sephirajo: (yahtzee gun at the head)
I'm hovering somewhere between 'fine' and 'depressed.' I have twenty dollars for the next two weeks, bills coming due and yeah.

We sent off the affidavit of beneficiary for Dad's last check and his bonus. It will be split three ways. Of course, we have no idea how long this will take and how long it will be. So, things are going to be interesting for awhile.

Chuck wants me to go on disability. I really don't want to. Then what would I do? Sit around all day and soak up my pain? Fuck no. It's not like his bio-polar disorder where it's bad enough to distrupt how you react to things sometimes...

It's not the same freaking thing. Chuck says I have too much pride. *sigh*

I don't know how we're going to get through the next few days. But I'll send Chuck to the food shelf for that... if we can get stuff like that... the rest of my money can go to gas. :/

I... am thinking of getting a new job. I love my job but if I could get something like at comcast with the pay being a bit more and a night-ish shift... that might be a bit easier for me? Maybe.

I want to try to get another job, but there's no way I could hold two jobs.

What I would love to do would be to go back to school, but I don't see that ever happening.

I miss Dad too... that's making me sick. It's amazing how much stress can fuck with both the lupus and the fibro. To the point where it hurts to wear clothes. The other peeps on my Flist who deal with this know just what I'm talking about.

I was going to say something else, but one, I can't remember what it was and two I don't want to worry anyone. The fits of just staring off into nothing are getting worse.

I want to try to write some of my original stuff before my brains go down the tubes completely. But I... can't stand my own writing. It's like it's missing something... Nothing ever seems right to me. I worry about my RP writing too, if it's up to snuff.

And now I'm just rambling. Long story short: I'm broke, paranoid, self loathing, slightly depressed and in pain.

I want to hear Dad use the line from Big Trouble in Little China once more. Just once more. Since he always adapted it to us...

Fang, you were not put on this Earth to get it.

Ah Dad. I really don't get it. So you, and that creepy old Chinese guy, were right.


Mar. 12th, 2009 12:16 am
sephirajo: (Snape)
And... just lost Cammie's paid account. Sigh.

Well, hopefully I'll be able to pay it on the 20th.

...That's not the only one coming up that's going to get the axe either. Ahh, there goes all my paid accounts for RP stuff.

At least this is paid through the year. *pokes it* Can't take my personal account from me! HAHA!
sephirajo: (Fragile... must be italin.)
Yeah, I've been a bad girl with no updates. I'll try to write some more tonight but the last few weeks have been draining.

To answer Wicked's question: I'm due in February. The end of the month, the 26th. I'm looking forward to it. ^___^ (If only so I can eat and not still be hungry, stupid diet.)

For Jai, I will have belly pictures, just have to remind the hubby to pick up a camera.

We are really short cash wise right now, but that's not so much a problem as it is an annoyance.

Other than th at, life has been... interesting. My Grandmother (the cool one) just got out of surgery for breast cancer and will now be starting chemo. Last night I had a nose bleed that lasted an hour after literally just exploding all over my dinner plate. We almost went to the hospital.

Apparently, you're not supposed to blow out the snot clots...

That would've been nice to know. But yeah. Not a good last few weeks. I'll do a better update tonight and sorry for the silence, everyone! T__T

Emo check!

Sep. 6th, 2006 05:57 pm
sephirajo: (Light of a fading star)
Sometimes I wonder if anyone beyond a handful of people actually read anything on here. I mean, if I posted that I had been covered with leaches and dying a very sucky death would anyone say anything? Then again, could I even type when covered with said leaches?

I'm hungry.

Chuck's not here.

His car needs over 600$ of work, we're behind on payments for both cars, and now we think we may have to file for bankruptcy.

I was thinking of starting up a journal just for my writing, but what's the point if no one even reads it on this one?

With the way I feel some days, if it's true that babies pick up on their mom's emotional state, I'm going to have one fucked up little kid.

And when he's older and all rebellious and depressed and stuff and asks why he's like that, I'll be able to tell him, "Because your mom had the burning urge to shoot herself for unrelated reasons when carrying you."

I don't like me. But I think I have plenty of reasons for that.

Stupid attention whore complex.


Dear "Uncle" Joey,
Fuck you and stop sending us shit! I don't want you sending my husband birthday cards, and if you send me one I will respond by sending a mail bomb designed to blow off your privates. (Or what a "man" of your tastes must have.)

Thinking of you makes me want to do bad things to both you and myself. So stop it.

No more letters. No more emails, no more ANYTHING.

Nothing. Stop it. I don't know where you got the idea that it was okay to keep in contact with me, but you can go choke on something. Please go choke on something. I've always wanted to dance on a casket and it might as well be yours.


May. 8th, 2006 07:36 pm
sephirajo: (Subaru)
When it comes to being fucked - I truly take the cake in so many ways.

1. I'm working over time again, another fifty-one hour week.

2. I have a killer fucking migraine right now and I'm still allergic to the one thing my doctor was kind enough to prescribe to me.

3. I'm behind on my car payments.

4. Chuck and I have five dollars to last us until Friday, when we will most likely have LESS and not MORE depending on how everything works out with his paycheck.

5. I had something to put here, but I can't think right now... stupid migraine. Oh yeah - STILL not pregnant.

6. People at my work are idiots. I got an email today for someone asking if it was okay to sell a vehicle in an account I was working on...when the okay to sell date was clearly noted in the account.

7. I'm about ready to keel over, I can feel it. It feels anti-fuzzy.

8. I'm hungry, tired, and my dog is an asshat.

9. I fail at life in general sometimes.

10. I'm fucked. No ifs ands or buts about it, I am really and truly fucked.

With that, ladies and gentlemen... good night.


Sep. 9th, 2005 05:21 pm
sephirajo: (Azu Roll)
Cut for hugeness )

*happy squeein' noises*


sephirajo: (Default)
Sephira jo

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